Five Rules For Surviving Outside Your Comfort Zone

I’m starting this post with a confession/apology to any client who I’ve glibly encouraged to step outside of their comfort zone. Three weeks ago I sat part way down a vertical sheet of ice thwacking it with my ski pole. I then broke down in frustration and tears vowing to end my 2 day old experiment with the ‘fun’ of skiing. I was way outside my comfort zone – which is, incidentally, the only place that change takes place.

This diagram represents your comfort zone. It is made up of three distinct areas: A, B and C. Getting to know and understand what defines your version of these zones is an important aspect of self-understanding.

Your comfort zone is Zone A in this diagram. What words do you link with comfort? Positive words like ease, stability, security, relaxation perhaps? What about words like sameness, boredom and stagnation. Your comfort Zone A has positive and negative associations.

Zone B is immediately outside your comfort zone. It has definite negative associations: obviously discomfort, stress, uncertainty, fear, struggle and vulnerability. But it also has a positive aspect: challenge, adventure, excitement, learning and most importantly, change.

Zone C is when you’ve gone too far and there isn’t really a positive aspect other than survival.

To survive in Zone B here are my life coach top tips:

1. Recognise that little in this zone will feel, um, comfortable. You are supposed to feel out of your depth and experience some stress.
2. Set step-by-step plans for any activity outside your comfort zone and get immediate feedback about any progress you make. This will help you measure progress, learning and change.
3. Try and find a level of challenge that is just higher than your skill but not so far that you end up in Zone C. This is a recognized component of flow states.
4. From time to time decide to step outside of your comfort zone rather than allow life to do it for you. That way you can control the experience and keep your confidence topped up. Read this post for more explanation.
5. Work with someone who can provide impartial advice and guideance. You don’t necessarily want to get straight back into your comfort zone, which might be the solution offered by a close friend.

As it turned out, by the end of the week, I was well and truly hooked by skiing. And I had a object experiential lesson in the fine balance required to survive outside of my comfort zone. Hopefully I’ll be a better coach for it.

And now for your comments: